Wanted

Friend for life.  Or longer.

No age requirement.  No minimum or maximum.

Religion? Skin? Accent? Educated? Employed? Who cares?

You know I couldn’t care less if you’re divorced or married or somewhere in between.  I don’t care a whit if you’ve had kids, have kids, or never got kids.  At this point in my life, it’s definitely not about the kids.

I’d prefer if you liked dogs.  But not mandatory.  Just makes it easier when you come to visit.

I don’t need a lot of your time.  I honestly prefer to be on my own. I’ve got a husband and kids and a farm.  And a stack of books teetering on my headboard.  And I’m not even a quality time person.  I don’t need girls’ nights out or movie dates. I’d rather spend evenings with my family to be honest; I don’t see them enough.  I don’t love spending money going out to eat.  But now and then is fine.  I prefer quiet lunches in our homes, intimate cozy settings where we can laugh out loud in private and cry our tears in peace.

Please don’t worry about gifts.  I’m not really into things.  I know some of you feel like you need to on my birthday or for Christmas, but truly, not the least bit necessary.  (But just between you and me, I love, love, love an unexpected note in the mail once or twice a year.  A text every few weeks just to check in.  But that’s just frosting on the cake.)

What I’m really looking for is someone who will skip the small talk and just talk.  And listen occasionally.  But mostly just tell me I’m normal as you share your life with me.  Don’t hide the ugly stuff.  I’m good with messes.  Be imperfect.  Let me have to move the laundry so I can sit on my socked feet for an impromptu afternoon visit.  Linger.  And encourage me to skip what I had planned and stay a little longer.

Give me the benefit of the doubt.  Assume I’m doing my best.  And that I would never in a million years do anything to offend or hurt you.  Help me work through our misunderstandings so I can learn.  I want to learn.  Because then I can do better.  But some women just leave without ever telling me where we went wrong.  It breaks my heart and leaves me to wonder for months and even years.  Nothing hurts worse.  Please don’t do that to me.  Be honest.  I can take honest.  If you do it with love.  Just remember if it seems mean, it was never intentional, are you kidding?

Trust me.

To be honest, I just want someone who will let me share this life with her. I spend so much of the days being pleasant and dutiful and tactful and politically correct.  I want a friend I can let my (naturally gray) hair down with.  I want her to open her heart and let me have a peek.  I want her to know mine has been just as bruised.  But that I’m a risk taker.  I’m ok with being vulnerable.  I’m happy to share my thoughts, my feelings, my insecurities, my frailties, my weaknesses, my hopes, my flaws.  And of course I’d expect the same from you.  Sadly, this is too much to ask from most women.  Which is why I wanted to spell it all out. 

So before you reply, think about it.  All I’m promising you is loyalty from here to the end.  And beyond.  Just let me know if you’re in.